Truly there is a season to everything in life. The literal season right now is a very swampy and humid typical DC Metro summer. These conditions are not favorable if you are not a mosquito or a toucan.
Hannah is packing up her family and her life here and moving back West. Her goodbye party was at the park in the picture above. It's such an odd mix of emotions. I'm actually really excited that she's moving back and will be able to 1. Get the fuck out of pretentious DC 2. Be close to her family and 3. Get the fuck out of pretentious DC.
Hannah is one of my rare gems in life where she is insanely smart, advocates professionally/in life in general for equality and has such a big heart/compassion for people and situations. She's extremely genuine and for all the reasons above she is undoubtedly not made to be in this area for longer than she already has been. Now her beautiful baby boy will not grow up to be an asshole, but considering who his parents are that would never have happened anyway.
I never got to see Hannah often enough but when I did, it was awesome and always like picking right up. I really feel like she's on my side in life (not that she agrees with my opinions or actions all the time but rather genuinely gives a shit about me and wants me to do well in life).
Sometimes I avoid people when too much bad shit is going on bc it's terrible to constantly talk about that. It's such a buzzkill and as nice as some friends can be, it can be exhausting--I feel the same way when I catch up with people and it's like sighhh here we go again. But ive never gotten that with her. She admits her own shortcomings in life and it's just refreshing.
I say this all to say, I hate to see her go bc I have grown to hate people but I don't hate Hannah :)
Ironically, on the same day, I found out that one of my best friends Jeremy is moving to Florida. Same idea with him which is that he needed a change from this area and it was making him jaded. Maybe he would've been jaded bc of life rather than geographic location but I don't think that being in this area helped.
Sorry Jeremy for giving you the short end of the stick bc I gushed about Hannah and have not about you. But if I were to do it briefly, it would be that I truly think I've never met anyone else that legitimately didn't judge me for anything that I was or am--physically, financially, mentally/emotionally. Definitely did not agree with me and my crazy but never made me feel like it was not ok to be me. Got lots of tough love and lectures but always from a good place. It was like having a true male BFF but not quite brother status. I hope to be able to be as seemingly apathetic as he is towards strangers feelings which makes him sound like a dick and he can be at times but, truly, why should anyone else, particularly strangers, thoughts or perceptions bother me? Fuck them is what he'd say. I'd agree but secretly be hurt and stew and lament over people that shouldn't matter...
Again, I feel some sadness sinking in because while neither of them is terminally ill or anything, things aren't ever quite the same when people move and though you may not see them often at all, there's something to be said about being able to call someone up and meet for a coffee or go to their place or whatever.
Their seasons are up in the DC area and they are certainly taking a piece of my heart with them.
And speaking of friends for a season, I ran into a girl who o used to consider like a sister and we haven't spoken in almost a decade... She looked stunned to see me. I just smiled and kept walking and it wasn't in a bitchy way. It was more like, I wasn't going to pretend like I didn't know her... I also truthfully was on a time crunch. In a way I kinda hope to run into her again just to say hi and wish her well in life. Maybe that day will come and maybe not but its funny when all the hurt and anger is gone, you sincerely do feel nothing for the person and truly do wish them well in life. Why not? Maybe we weren't meant to be friends or served our purpose in the other ones life.
Whatever it is, the seasons are changing. Usually I associate that with any other season but summer. Summers I usually equate with being settled. Lazy. Carefree. Routine. Vaycay. Relax. Quick romantic flings and trips and things. Not big life moves but here they are, moving along. And why shouldn't they?
I'm continuing to figure shit out and hope one day when I move along, in whatever capacity, that I am missed and will have made an impact, even if a small footprint, on the lives of those I considered friends or romantically involved with.
xo
